The Death Of The Bamboo Poles...

Just on Friday, July 8, one reader wrote in to Today, citing his (or was it a her?) comments about the hazards of people who fall to their deaths while using bamboo poles to dry their clothes. And I quote:

"Then there is always the danger of the pole holders becoming loose, or the poles are not being secured, resulting in a high chance of them coming loose in strong winds, falling and hitting someone. Town Councils have restricted people from hanging objects such as potted plants outside windows. Wouldn't the use of bamboo poles fall under this category of accidents waiting to happen?"

And this smarty pants suggested the following:

Restrict the length of the poles if they are to be used outside the windows to 1m, for example. This will reduce the total weight of the pole and the clothes.

Eh hello? You stupid or what? 1m? How much clothes can you hang on a pole that is of only an arm's length? The bamboo poles in my home are already 4-5m long, and I've got 6 of them. So how many 1m bamboo poles you want me to buy? And where you want me to hang them, since the kitchen window only has 3 slots (can be overloaded to 5 poles at a time).

Conclusion: You are either a bamboo pole seller, or you are a stupid lazy-bum who doesn't wash your own laundry, or you are a spinster or single living alone who has only 3 pieces of clothings to wash every week.

Educate the public on the importance of checking the pole holders periodically to
ensure they are not loose. Officials should also do random checks to ensure compliance.

Oh great! You stupid fool! Singapore does not need another ARE-YOUR-BAMBOO-POLE-HOLDERS-SAFE? campaign. And thank you very much, you just gave the gahmen a great idea to get more money out of us, by having these random checks, and then implementing a possible "fine" to home owners with non-compliant pole holders. All in the education of the public, of course.

Conclusion: You probably aren't Singaporean, or you have been pretty supportive of all the campaigns that have been going on for the past few year (no campaign lethargic-ness). Or you probably think through the other end of your body by wanting the gahmen to interfere in this.

If all else fails, restrict the use of the poles to indoors.

A round of applause for this person please? Thank you! Let's get some facts straight first:

1. Indoor bamboo pole holders (those on the ceiling type) are normally located where? In the kitchen of course, where else? You don't see them in your bedroom, or the living room. So what happens when you are cooking in the kitchen, and your clothes are still wet and drying? Use your brain please.

2. If you are talking about those metal stands for propping up the bamboo poles, that's worse. Who in the right mind would want to devote 3-4 square metres of their already-cramped-pigeon-holes to their laundry? Use your brain please.

Conclusion: You either do not cook or use your kitchen ever, or you probably have never known what it means to "do your laundry".

It sometimes is really amusing to see this type of comments being published in the local papers. It probably will get the tourists or expats to ROFLMAO when they see this type of think-through-your-ass comments being made by the locals.

PS: I am 80% sure that this reader who wrote in is a woman. Because men simply won't be bothered about bamboo poles, nor people dying because of them. Next time, use your brain, bitch.