The Law Of Conservation Of Happiness...

Statement:

Happiness is never created, nor can it be destroyed. It can only be transferred. The total amount of net happiness present in this world, is zero.

Proof:

1. When a group of boys are playing football at the void deck of your neighbouring block of flats at 0200hrs in the morning, they become happy.

2. You become unhappy, because they make a hell lotta noise.

3. You call in the cops to investigate this domestic disturbance, and then you become happy.

4. The cops become unhappy, having to answer the call by sending out a patrol car in the dead of the night.

5. You see the cops arrive at the scene, and your happiness increases at the thought of the boys who will be punished.

6. However the boys playing soccer have already escaped before the arrival of the cops, and thus the boys in blue become more unhappy when they see that there is nobody at the scene of the disturbance.

7. The boys playing soccer escaped with the largest net positive profit of happiness. You gain a small amount of positive profit happiness since the disturbance has ceased to be (although not eradicated totally). The boys in blue are at the losing end with the largest negative loss of happiness, having been called out in the dead of the night, AND finding out that there is no source of noise disturbance to investigate.

Net of large amount of happiness in the boys playing soccer + Net of small amount of happiness in you = Net of large amount of unhappiness in the cops

Moving the RHS to the LHS, we see that the equation equals to 0. QED.